NO THING - Surreal Arcade Trip

Picked this up on Switch years back when it was on a good sale, never got around to beating it but I just bought it again on the app store so I could play on my phone! The aesthetics are fun, the robotic narration gets stuck in my head just as much as the music, and the gameplay is challenging enough to make me want to keep trying again and again. Controls are simple, I turn my phone sideways and just tap the left or right of the screen to turn the direction I want. Haven’t figured out how to pause on the iOS version but other than that, it’s a fantastic port of an enjoyable game.

alexanaduSat, Feb 10, 2024

United States

the gameplay is simple and sounds and looks easy but is actually really hard it took me a while to just beat level 2, even though it is simple it actually has a story and the dialogue is interesting and does a good yet cryptic job of world building, and the visuals are also simple but complements the feeling of it very well and looks nice, highly recommended for such a small price

Desmond the human beingMon, Apr 3, 2023

United States

It's a rather boring endless runner. I thought I was getting into something here... And all I had to do was beat level 1 of the storyline. But it seems to really just be as simple as some of the other low star reviews.

pinkthesinkMon, Jan 29, 2018

United States

I'm going to try and get my money back, having been tricked into buying this thing. This thing seems to have been designed by an AI with the barest understanding of what constitutes a game. Either that or it was a level one exercise in graphics programming at a coding institute in an East Asian country. It really is simply a few basic programming elements slapped haphazardly together … and that's it. Basically you tap left and right to guide a first-person perspective "runner" down platforms in a 3D monochrome maze as an 8-bit theme, around five notes booping up and down a major scale, loops in the background and a voice narrates nonsense phrases: "Your shoes are shiny. Now is not the time for your inner fight. I am not with you." Like that. The eye-hurting monochrome colors change randomly. There are a few random objects floating in space between the platforms: woman heads, Ben Franklin heads, arms, buildings. They serve no purpose. The screen glitches randomly. Sometimes your runner runs into a cube that chimes and changes the monochrome background once more. If you fall off the platform you start over. As you progress down the maze the runner's speed increases, and the runner's base starting speed also increases a little each time you are "killed" and restart, unless you force quit the game and restart the app entirely to bring your runner back to the beginning base speed … so probably the game designers gain some advantage every time a player logs out of Game Center and logs back in again, maybe something involving ranking. Anyhow, there are no clues to the mazes, and most of the challenge of running through them involves poor control response or being visually unable to see what's happening, either by having the screen blocked by glitches or by being blinded by a particularly bright monochrome background, lime on canary, for example, or orange against tangerine. Finishing a level brings up a new one that's slightly different from the last, for no particular reason, as there is no storyline, no plot, no interaction other than tapping left and right and hoping the runner responds, and the random objects don't change, they just cycle. Seriously, this is a coding exercise someone decided to sell as an overpriced app. Imagine you were demonstrating 3D technology for the first time, and you just looped visuals of a first-person perspective going over a set of ramps, turning left and right around an Atari 2600 representation of a city comprising nine office blocks, three woman heads, a Ben Franklin head and seven up-stretched arms. To demonstrate voice synthesis you program in some phrases from a phrase book: "Your shoes are shiny. The city is alive tonight." Because you're limited to 8-bit color for this 101 class exercise you choose monochromes of lime green against emerald green. And that's it. But to drum up excitement you shell out one eighth of a Bitcoin to bored Russian youths on whatever the current version of Hansa Market is to buy 250 good reviews from them. And there you have the game's gameplay and business model. …Enjoy? Seriously, don't buy this thing. Just don't. Get a level-1 programming book and code in the first exercise of the first page of the first chapter into Eclipse yourself and you will get pretty much the same result, for cheaper, and you'll have learned a new skill to boot. But don't reward the lazy failing student who cribbed this from a beginner's guide to 8-bit color and 3D vector plane graphics.

Ricky TenderkissWed, Nov 1, 2017

United States

I played this game time and time again and every single time it never lets me turn the way I want to and I can't even get past level one because of that I don't get it

blondesharkMon, Oct 30, 2017

United States

I usually do not write reviews, but I decided it was needed for this game. The graphics are amazing, it's very aesthetically pleasing to the eye. The music grabs you and tugs you back into simple 8-bit music, and it fits well with the gameplay, even I, who would turn on music while playing games instead of listening to the soundtracks, kept the sound on for this game. Some people might complain the gameplay is repetitive, but compared to other "free" war or matching games, it's pretty tame, and takes it's own spin on things. Some people will whine because they aren't open to games that take a different direction. I highly suggest this game for any looking for a nice time waster, this is with no doubt worth the 2 dollars.

~SoulsSun, Sep 17, 2017

United States

I want a refund

Tomi919Sun, Jul 9, 2017

United States